hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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