so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
