I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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