This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
