i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
