You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
