airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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