I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
