i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
