no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize