found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
