Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
