I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
i think im in europe. pls send help
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
