Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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