Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
worst night to have a conscience
you mean i was at the winter classic?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
