I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
