You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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