We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
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