Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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