On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
