There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
