I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
