I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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