That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
