North Korea, Best Korea!
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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