he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
