Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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