How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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