Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
false alarm. still invincible.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize