I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
