wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
