Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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