Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
