thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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