I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize