I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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