it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
