you guys were way drunker than both of me
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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