Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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