And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize