Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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