I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
