yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
