How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Randomize
