It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize