bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
