Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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