why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
