FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
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