it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Randomize